Monday, July 18, 2011

Suicide

I'm posting this due to the recent loss of a friend. I know for a fact he's in a better place, but he'll be missed his friends and family. 

Here's facts and how to know the signs and what you can do about it:



On average, 3,500 Canadians take their own lives every year - this often exceeds the number of deaths caused by road accidents. Although more women attempt suicide, about four times as many men as women die from their suicide attempt. The reason for this is that men generally use more lethal means such as firearms, hanging, or asphyxiation (suffocation). Women often use drug overdoses or asphyxiation, or they cut themselves. Firearms are used in about 30% of all suicides. Of all deaths that involve firearms, more than half are estimated to be suicides.

Certain groups have disproportionately high suicide rates compared to the general population:
  • adolescents - in Canada, suicide accounts for 24% of all death among people who are 15 to 24 years of age
  • young men between the ages of 20 and 24
  • senior men over the age of 80
  • prison inmates, for whom suicide is the leading cause of death
  • people of First Nations and Inuit descent, who have suicide rates 3 to 6 times greater than the national average; this is even higher for adolescents 15 to 19 years old, with suicide occurring up to 8 times more frequently than for other Canadian youths
  • people with prior histories of attempted suicide
  • Causes of Suicide

    While the cause of suicide is unknown, some common risk factors include:
  • major psychiatric illness - in particular, mood disorders (e.g., depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia) and substance abuse (primarily alcohol abuse)
  • losing hope or the will to live
  • significant losses in a person's life, such as the death of a loved one, loss of an important relationship, loss of employment or self-esteem
  • unbearable emotional or physical pain

Warning signs and risk factors

A person who is at risk of committing suicide usually shows signs - whether consciously or unconsciously - that something is wrong. Keep an eye out for:
  • signs of clinical depression
  • withdrawal from friends and family
  • sadness and hopelessness
  • lack of interest in previous activities, or in what is going on around them
  • physical changes, such as lack of energy, different sleep patterns, change in weight or appetite
  • loss of self-esteem, negative comments about self-worth
  • bringing up death or suicide in discussions or in writing
  • previous suicide attempts
  • getting personal affairs in order, such as giving away possessions, or having a pressing interest in personal wills or life insurance
Though many people considering suicide seem sad, some mask their feelings with excessive energy. Agitation, hyperactivity, and restlessness may indicate an underlying depression that is being concealed.

Many people believe that even though a person might talk about suicide, they will not actually do it. In fact, talking about suicide is a warning sign that the person is at greater risk. If you become so overwhelmed by your problems that suicide is a consideration, you deserve to be taken seriously. Talking about suicide means that the potential exists to take your own life - even if you do not actually do it. Denial will not make the threat of suicide disappear and can only leave you feeling more alone and in anguish.

How to help

Do not hesitate to talk about suicide. If you think that someone you know is considering suicide, raise the subject. People are often relieved to talk to somebody about it. Recognizing their agony helps to ease the distress of carrying the burden of pain alone. It is important to listen to what somebody has to say without passing judgment on his or her feelings. Keep in mind that having no opportunity to talk about how badly he or she feels will only make a person feel more isolated.

You may sometimes worry that bringing up the subject of suicide will give ideas to an individual who is already depressed. On the contrary, showing your concern lets a person in distress know that somebody is listening to them. If that person really is considering taking his or her own life, talking provides an outlet for intense, often overwhelming feelings.

Ask direct questions - avoiding the topic may show that you do not take a person's threats seriously enough to inquire. Find out if suicide has been considered, and if they have thought out how and when they want to do it. The more details that have been worked out, the greater the danger that someone plans to commit suicide.

Suicide attempts are often a cry for help. While suicidal people are still alive, they may be holding out hope that they will find the means to cope with their emotions. Urge anybody who is considering suicide to get the counselling and medical or psychological support that they need as soon as possible.

Emergency assistance

Immediate assistance is available for people who are overwhelmed by pain and loneliness and need somebody to talk to. When a person is in distress, telephone counselling, crisis lines, and suicide hotlines offer a no-pressure context in which to talk to a caring and anonymous counsellor. Telephone hotlines are also useful if you are worried about a friend who is suicidal and want to know what you should do in a particular situation.

Local services are listed in city or regional phone books. You can also call directory assistance or 2-1-1 in some areas for community service agencies. If there is a problem getting through to the phone service, don't give up; either call again or phone a different service. Help is often very close at hand, and can give a suicidal person the extra time they need to reconsider their options and circumstances.

If you are urgently concerned that somebody is in a suicidal state, try to get them to the emergency ward of a hospital. Medical professionals can most effectively deal with suicidal tendencies and ensure that people gets the care required to stay alive.

Individuals who have hit an emotional rock bottom often cannot see how to pull themselves back up. Reaching out and finding support - either among friends and family, or in religious or social institutions - can provide people with some relief and new hope in their lives.

Getting treatment

When suicidal thoughts are brought on by an immediate interpersonal life event, then reliving this event or talking with a close friend or family member may resolve the crisis.

Next post: Depression...

"How can you know what pain is?”

“Maybe you’re right. I don’t know what pain is. I guess sitting by the phone for hours waiting for someone to call, but knowing they won’t isn’t pain. Crying myself to sleep every night isn’t pain, because every word They say cuts deeper than a knife cutting my flesh: I guess having my heart ripped out and thrown around every day by someone I love isn’t pain. Waking up every morning alone and succumbing to sleep every night alone isn’t pain. I guess being consumed by the anger and frustration I have festering in my heart isn’t pain. Not being able to look at my reflection in a mirror without turning away in disgust and dissatisfaction because I know I’m not happy, because I know my life is an intricate, deceptive stage cloaked with careful lies isn’t pain. I guess feeling indifferent to the wonders of life, to the spectacular vitality and invincibility so easily found in the new generation isn’t pain. Feeling numb and not disappointed anymore when, for the millionth time, I am rejected from society isn’t pain. I guess choosing to escape the real world around me through the fictitious but marvelous realm of literature—being forced to substitute selfish friends with that of book characters isn’t pain. I guess becoming a slave to my own morbid, purely hopeless thoughts, and becoming imprisoned in my own self-destructing Hell isn’t pain. Being aware of an invisible, decaying clock buried in my body, and acutely conscious of the absolute alienation I have been vacuumed perpetually into isn’t pain…I guess you are right."
— Amanda Rosso and Kayla Gough

Sunday, July 17, 2011

A Quote I can really relate to.

"I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond!
 

I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.

Behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve, ridin the wave, dodgin the bullet and pushin the envelope. I’m on-point, on-task, on-message and off drugs. I’ve got no need for coke and speed. I've got no urge to binge and purge. I’m in-the-moment, on-the-edge, over-the-top and under-the-radar. A high-concept, low-profile, medium-range ballistic missionary. A street-wise smart bomb. A top-gun bottom feeder. I wear power ties, I tell power lies, I take power naps and run victory laps. I’m a totally ongoing big-foot, slam-dunk, rainmaker with a pro-active outreach. A raging workaholic. A working rageaholic. Out of rehab and in denial!


I’ve got a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a personal assistant and a personal agenda. You can’t shut me up. You can’t dumb me down because I’m tireless and I’m wireless, I’m an alpha male on beta-blockers.


I’m a non-believer and an over-achiever, laid-back but fashion-forward. Up-front, down-home, low-rent, high-maintenance. Super-sized, long-lasting, high-definition, fast-acting, oven-ready and built-to-last! I’m a hands-on, foot-loose, knee-jerk head case pretty maturely post-traumatic and I’ve got a love-child that sends me hate mail.


But, I’m feeling, I’m caring, I’m healing, I’m sharing-- a supportive, bonding, nurturing primary care-giver. My output is down, but my income is up. I took a short position on the long bond and my revenue stream has its own cash-flow. I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds and I watch trash sports! I’m gender specific, capital intensive, user-friendly and lactose intolerant.


I like rough sex. I like tough love. I use the “F” word in my emails and the software on my hard-drive is hardcore--no soft porn.


I bought a microwave at a mini-mall; I bought a mini-van at a mega-store. I eat fast-food in the slow lane. I’m toll-free, bite-sized, ready-to-wear and I come in all sizes. A fully-equipped, factory-authorized, hospital-tested, clinically-proven, scientifically- formulated medical miracle. I’ve been pre-wash, pre-cooked, pre-heated, pre-screened, pre-approved, pre-packaged, post-dated, freeze-dried, double-wrapped, vacuum-packed and, I have an unlimited broadband capacity.


I’m a rude dude, but I’m the real deal. Lean and mean! Cocked, locked and ready-to-rock. Rough, tough and hard to bluff. I take it slow, I go with the flow, I ride with the tide. I’ve got glide in my stride. Drivin and movin, sailin and spinin, jiving and groovin, wailin and winnin. I don’t snooze, so I don’t lose. I keep the pedal to the metal and the rubber on the road. I party hearty and lunch time is crunch time. I’m hangin in, there ain’t no doubt and I’m hangin tough, over and out!"

— George Carlin

Kissed By God

Kissed By God Kissed By God by T.A. Chase

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


I usually avoid stories with this type of content and with good reason. I know first hand what it's like to be 'kisses by god'. I'm not proud of that but it's part of my past and in the past it will remain. But I took a chance and have no regrets. A pleasant read and worth it in my honest opinion. You'll be able to connect with the character which by the way it's written in first person and from his point of view.

I'd say if you're unsure, give it a go anyhow.



View all my reviews

Thursday, July 14, 2011

IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... REPOST THIS.

((This is not something I wrote, but it touched me deeply so I'm re-posting it))

I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn't have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.

I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson"

I am girl who had to break up with my lover because my parents found out it was another girl.